AKA Abraham Bacoln

Antithanksgiving (as opposed to anti-tank weapons)

So hey, I’m just gonna go ahead and buck the trend here, mmmmkay, and discuss something for which I am NOT thankful.

Two-thirds of the population is considered right-eye dominant. You know, that means that they (and I’m referring to ‘they’, not ‘us’, for a reason which … well, you’re smart, you’ve probably already figured this bit out) prefer to view objects with their right eye. It’s called ocular dominance if you want to read up on it some more.

Aaaaanyway, I’m part of the one-third group that’s left-eye dominant. Anyone that has tried on my eyeglasses for fun or profit has probably noticed there’s almost no correction in my right-hand lens. That’s because my right eye has nearly 20-20 vision – it’s my left eye that sucks. Astigmatism, if you want to get picky.

All this means is that I’m having to train myself to put the camera up to my right eye, which feels totally wrong to me. I usually don’t wear my glasses while shooting, and therefore doing any sort of manual focus with my screwed up dominant left eye is a royal pain in the ass. Plus if I use my dominant eye I’m always smashing my nose into the back of the camera. Smudgy.

THIS IS SOMETHING FOR WHICH I AM NOT THANKFUL. My body has cursed me with a preference for the lesser choice. Blargh.

Do you know which of your eyes is dominant? Doesn’t really matter, but if you want to find out, do this simple test. Look at a distant object, extend your arms, and form a triangle around the object with your hands, like this:

Close your left eye, then open it and close your right eye. Whichever eye is seeing the object is your dominant eye. Notice: do not attempt this while drunk.

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Okay, okay, fine, here’s a list of things for which I am thankful today.

I have my health, I have a functioning version of sanity, I got to eat a fantastic Thanksgiving lunch with my parents and an old family friend, and I also got to eat ANOTHER fantastic Thanksgiving dinner with my in-laws, my brother-in-law and his wife, and their beautiful baby.

Seriously, my stomach is very thankful that my family’s tradition is an early afternoon meal and that my in-laws prefer supper. That makes it real easy for me to stay bloated like a tick the entire day.

Also, I’m grateful that I’ve a tiny Christmas wish list, meaning that I have been successful in eschewing overwhelming greed and materialism. Okay, yeah, so there’s a Canon 50mm f/1.8 lens on there, but that’s the only thing I actually really want, and I think the parents are going to take care of that. The rest of you, you poor souls who torture yourself by reading my drivel, I love all of you, and having you in my life is gift enough.

I hope everyone’s T-Day was as simple, heartwarming, and relaxing as mine. You all deserve the best.

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