AKA Abraham Bacoln

It’s official – official in the biggest sense of the word, in the “eminating from or attributable to a person in office; properly authorized” sense – I’m single again. I know most of you probably assumed the divorce had been finalized a long time ago but no. It took a while. Now it’s done, and that’s really all there is to say about that. I just wanted to clear up any potential lingering confusion.

While Clinton is indeed fierce and intelligent, I feel like she is disingenuous. And, she freaks me out a little. I realize she’s human, but it does bother me that she can be brittle, and for some reason, she strikes me as a person who could, at any time, yell “TINA! BRING ME THE AXE!” or some other Joan Crawfordism, while Obama seems pretty level-headed. And this impression has nothing to do with Clinton’s gender–I can see Howard Dean backfiring a la Ash from “Alien” and spitting up milk everywhere.

Thanks, Corri.

About two weeks ago now I submitted a photo to Wired‘s biweekly photo contest. The theme was self portraits. It ended up falling out of the top 10 spot but then surprisingly got listed in the editor’s pics. So. I am now Internet Famous. Hold on to your hats. The next fifteen seconds will be really intense.

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okay, glad that’s over. Oh, wait, it’s on the front page of Wired for today, or at least for a few more hours, or maybe it’s gone already. That’s why I took a screenshot so I can remember, years from now, that I was Internet Famous for just one day.

Thanks to Trey for the heads up. I wouldn’t have noticed otherwise.

EDIT: Apparently Trey got his info from Jason Coleman so thanks, JC. Also I meant to link to the original on Flickr in case anyone missed it the first time.

1.) I woke up this morning directly after a dream in which I had both smelled something and clearly read words. I didn’t think I could do either of those things in my dreams. In fact, I had just finished telling Jason the other day that we humans couldn’t do those things in dreams. I guess I was very wrong. Are you able to clearly smell or read in dreams?

You know what? That’s not really important. What’s more important is this:

2.) Yesterday Matthew, Leon, my mom, my dad and I went out to (what I will now start referring to as) the firing range (even though it is just Leon’s farm) to do a little target practice. I am simultaneously saddened and proud to announce that my mother, who had not fired a weapon in something like 26 years, showed us up. Her skill with that old Ruger 10/22 put us all to shame. After her first few shots I wanted to say, “See, I come by my good aim naturally” but after the next 30 or 40 all I could think was, “Well, apparently I didn’t get as much of it as I thought.” So great job, Mom!

Matthew says his mom is a better shot but I think he has mom envy.

It’s not Easter yet but I might forget.

Do you? Do you know what I want? Do you know what I am VERY EXCITED ABOUT?

That’s right!

I WANT A BINTURONG

That is a BINTURONG aka BEARCAT and IT IS NEITHER BEAR NOR CAT sorry I’m getting a bit excited IT HAS BEEN A GREAT DAY FOR YELLING

Here, let me quote the Wikipedia entry at you:

It is nocturnal and sleeps on branches. It eats primarily fruit, but also has been known to eat eggs, shoots, leaves and small animals, such as rodents or birds. […] The Binturong can make chuckling sounds when it seems to be happy and utter a high-pitched wail if annoyed. The Binturong can live over 20 years in captivity.

Can you stand it? A pet that CHUCKLES? I need a happy chuckling BEARCAT waking me up in the middle of the night, perched on my dresser or something, looking down on me with its creepy BEARCAT eyes or hell I dunno just whatever they do I totally want one. Also they say “when it seems to be happy” which means NO ONE KNOWS WHEN A BEARCAT IS HAPPY. They are full of mystery.

I BET MY HOUSECAT WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A BINTURONG AROUND

Seriously go do a Google image search for binturong and tell me they’re not just the craziest things ever.

They are also apparently vicious when cornered. I will have an ATTACK BEARCAT.

Don’t come over any more.

EDIT: aw jeez I TOTALLY forgot to mention that they smell like popcorn. POPCORN!